Wow! I am sorta impressed!

So the numbers pretty much say it all.  I did fantastic on day 4 of my plan.  I have listened to my subliminal mp3s every single night.  I did start taking the SW today though and I feel great and proud too.  Yeah me!

The part where I am really impressing myself is that I seem to be stretching my times almost to the next interval before I even get to that particular level.  Still working on a visualization of being completely smoke free.  I think that's gonna end up being more of a leap of faith for me with my Pruner than anything else.  Which is fine, because all things are possible through Him.  Amen.

= = JUST NOTICED = = the smoking log is updating all days to the current stats - so the colors for plan days 1-3 are inaccurate, but then again it makes yesterday look all the more better :D

It's not going quite as expected

From the photo of my smoke log, I am definitely doing better on my second day of the plan, but I gotta say I feel like I'm doing worse.  I even altered the plan by increasing my Tobacoff but was irritable and craved them the worst since this quit plan even came to mind.

(above written on day 2.....following is the early morning of day 3)

This cigarette doesn't quite taste the same.  Could be me reading to much into it. And yesterday's issue could have something to do with being the last day of my 3 day weekend.  I did get lots of gum and candies though to help with "cravings"and I pulled out a pack of smoking withdrawal pills to see if that would help me as well.  I have been thinking about future days when I don't get to smoke every hour and how I will behave.  I see peoples' point in just quitting cold turkey, because it's almost as I'd I am just prolonging the misery stretching things out.  In my dream world I would be like Pavlov's dogs and just enjoy life as usual until I heard the somewhat obnoxious alarm I intentionally set to tell myself that time has passed and it's okay to smoke.  But I also don't want to end up waiting the rest of my life for that tune to play, you know?  In my dream world, much time would pass without me even conjuring a single thought of smoking.  And then when that one thought would come to mind and I saw that it had been soooooo long since  my last cigarette, I would be so pleased with myself that I would forget the craving and remain smoke free.

Well I can say I am having a craving right now....perhaps I should get out my old labor app and start tracking them that way!  HA!  Anyways it's time to wake up JJD and I still have laundry that need attention.  Please God help me through today by controlling my thoughts about future days.  =)  Amen.

Subliminal mp3

Had a bit of trouble falling asleep listening to it last night.  Well not really.  More like I woke up at the end and wasn't sure it had played all the way through - seemed like I had just fallen asleep and then the hour long recording was over, so I set it back up to play and then realized that it was an hour later than went I went to sleep!  Oh well! I went ahead and listened again anyways.

I really hope the supplement comes today.  I am interested to see how my system reacts with it. I need to add my Chantix experiences to the prologue. I an hopeful though that it won't be even close to that bad!

I wake up

And I start to freak out.  I am another day closer to quitting and I am having trouble envisioning my morning routine without smokes.  But I think I really need to work on this aspect of the quit.  I have always been the type of person that plans things out, from birthday parties to school night routines, I prepare myself in advance for how everything should flow and what possible things could go "wrong" and how I'll deal with those things.  I think I'll take some time today to create a page or two dedicated to NEW smokefree routines.  Perhaps it will release some of this anxiety I already feel, which seems completely odd to be feeling so strongly yet I am still smoking any and all cigarettes that I choose to smoke.  I really would like to start the herbal supplement because this already SUCKS!

For the record - I did listen to my subliminal mp3s last night.  I got further than I did the night before, but still fell asleep 2/3s of the way through....I think.  I'm not gonna lie, I do worry just a tiny bit that they are putting weird ideas in my head, but I'll just pray they don't turn me into a walking zombie and just help me quit smoking.  =)

Tracking

Where the heck are my packages any ways?  Need to track them down, because I really need to get them before the weekend!!!

I am already feeling a sense of apprehension, better quit smoking these cigarettes and get back into work!  And track my packages!  =)

New goal added to Get Rich or Die Smoking

This one is much more attainable!  At this point in my journey I think it'd be great to go once a month out to an "anniversary" dinner.  Sadly though, it will set us back a little on the BIG goal.  Of course this is all easy to plan while I sit in the car smoking three cigarettes in a row!  8-O

T minus 17 days

This is my first post to this blog which I just created.  I will be using it to journal my feelings and actions concerning quitting smoking and living my life as a nonsmoker.  There will appear to be older posts as I chronologically remember events in my life where smoking was involved.  Ehhh, maybe I said that wrong, because seriously, since the day I started, my entire life has revolved around a cigarette.  Anyways - cheers to you Victoria Lynn for "pruning" smokes out of your life forever!